The Chasm

I remember how easy it used to be

Closing my eyes shut

And, at once, seeing their names

On the back of my eyes

Painted in bright hues of red

Always so close to feel

To dream

To touch

With 'I love you's

Gushing out of my lips

Faster than I could remember to breathe.

Always,

All I did was love, love and love again

With never present people

Setting myself to rot

In the chasm they'd build

Out of lies and disguise

Naïvety or Delusion?

I could never figure.

Until one day,

I realized I was the liar

Falling in love with feelings

Never people.

Setting myself up for loss every time

Because despair was a feeling too

And I'd rather feel sad than empty;

Misery than nothingness.

Comments

PrakritiAugust 3, 2020 at 6:16 AM
I love that this makes me feel things❤
Not misery but something different, something nice.
ReplyDelete
Replies

Add comment

The little things that matter :)

We people take too many things for granted in life. We are never satisfied with the things we already have in our possession. Don't get me wrong, when I say things, I don't only mean the superficial things like house, car, dresses blah blah.... I'm using here it in the simplest sense. So that includes the good times, the bad times and all the the other things in life that you can think of at this very instant! Because even the worst things have some positive effect on us....... But us not knowing the worth of those moments is a completely different story... :P We are always very busy complaining about the things that have gone wrong or the things which we feel are 'well below the mark'. Why cant we just shut up, sit down and enjoy the awesomeness around us? Because no matter how miserable we feel our life is there's always this other person who would love to have our life , like any day..! When I say it out loud it does seem intriguing, doesn't it...

Sensations

PC: lovethispic.com He isn't cute. Cute doesn't even begin to describe half the person that he is. Cute is momentary, flimsy. And he is the furthest from flimsy as one can get. He is beautiful. His voice is beautiful, his laugh is beautiful and the way he looks at me, he makes me feel like I'm the most beautiful girl he's ever laid his eyes upon. He is a blazing flame. And I am but a mere moth. I'll get burnt, I know it. He doesn't promise me otherwise, either. Deciding it will be worth it has made all the difference. I could say I love him, but those three words can never justify the kaleidoscope of sensations I feel when I'm with him. He is all colors in one, at full brightness.

Love & Hate

PC: Elitedaily.com Silence woke her. As she laid on the floor, saliva drooping from her mouth, she realized it had gotten darker. She must have passed out for an hour or so. She sub-consciously touched her forehead. There was no blood this time but she knew it would bruise. The glass had hit her pretty hard, after all. Hits, Bruises and cover-ups were just another day in this household. As she got bearings of the time and place, she started to look around. Few yards away in the next room, she saw a heap of limbs passed out on the floor. Upon closer inspection, she could smell the concoction of alcohol, vomit and sweat. The view was jarring but she wasn't repulsed. The emotion that overcame her was pity. Pity at the man who was her husband. Pity at the man she once loved. As she looked back, she didn't know where exactly she she went wrong with her life. Born to a privileged family, she was smart and beautiful. No wonder, she had caught an athlete's eye. He was pre...

thank god it's friday

I don’t know if it’s just me or time seems to be moving a lot faster these days. I simply refuse to believe that it’s been 3 weeks since I joined my new job. And it’s end of March already? No fking way. I haven’t written for a big audience in a long time. If you know me, you know that I have always loved writing but over the past year, life caught up with me. I don’t know if mid 20s for everyone is a whirlwind or if it’s because I moved to a new country or because I was finishing up my Uni, working 4 days a week at my unpaid internship and 20 hours/week nightshift at the job that paid for my life all at the same time, everything was always too much. Sorry to my friends and family that I haven’t called in a while but calling takes too much effort. It’s my least favourite method of communication. But know that I miss you and I love you. Life isn’t bad at all, just a lot. I did try to start writing again in the past year and a half. But everything I wrote was stupid. I didn’t e...

I know I can count on you :)

Hey good people!! Its been long since I updated my blog. But you know,when I don't feel 'ít', I just can't write anything! lol I know that I keep telling this but every bit of the next sentence is true. I'm just crazy like that! :P Okay, so today's post is certainly not about my stupidity.(You had probably guessed that considering the large heading but I wanted to mention it anyways..lol) The post right here is about the people who accept my tantrums, silliness, mood swings and most importantly my 'short-temperedness' with ease ( I do 'chill out' after a short while even if I get angry VERY fast.. but lord bless those people!! It can be hard at times :P ) . This post is all about the people who make my life great. Yes,Friends are what i'm talking about...even if you didn't guess it already regarding the cheesy lines :P Today happens to be THE friendship day , so, I thought what better day could I pick to write about th...

Forever, Always . . . Infinity

There are two kinds of hurt. One is immediate, earth-shattering You wail, scream Weep for the person beyond measure When the self-pity ends, You pick yourself up, Oneday. Other one is slow and steady Creeping up on you when you least expect it. And when it arrives, It leaves back nothing in it's wake. Enveloping you in darkness It neither has an end nor a beginning Only a constant rhythm of hurt flowing through your veins. I don't know which is worse.

21

Being in love is magical. In its truest moment, it takes over your entire being. It's inexplicable yet it will be all that you want to talk about. It will feel like a breath of fresh air after you've been stuck under water for too long. No matter how I put it, it'll sound like a bunch of clichés strung together. Such is love. However, it won't always be the case of bed of roses and happy ever afters. After you've come up for air a few times, the water current will pull you down leaving you questioning if the few gulps of air somehow made your situation infinitely worse. Now you're addicted to the air, but he's left long ago. What do you do now? When you're a teenager, you're made to chase romantic fantasies and happy ever afters. But lets face it: Love is as hard to pull off as it is fulfilling. It takes too much of you when it doesn't work out. And despite having chased all-consuming love for some time in the recent past, somewhere al...

Turning Time

PC: thereadingroom.com [Published as 'There and back again' on 'The Kathmandu Post' on 24th July, 2016] As he entered the strange world, the air immediately got crisper, cooler. The fact that he had expected it didn't change how it affected him every time. The hair down his spine stood straight and he grabbed onto his jacket a little tighter. He was already out of place with his pair of jeans and blue button-down. His only hope was that the jacket shielded him against the oddity. Being transported to the new timeline was always strange. And the fact that he was always transported to the same date, July 28, 1914 even stranger. As he shuffled out the alley, he knew exactly what to expect. Just like the other times, a woman came charging down the street with a kid. He always narrowly missed stumbling into them. So today, he made a point to take a pause before entering the street. He was learning, despite the fact that he didn’t know why or how he got sent to t...

Questionable Choices

As of today, around 7 million people have viewed Deepika Padukone's Vogue Empowerment video. For the first few days, I just ignored it when it appeared on my Newsfeed. But a slew of jokes followed and I knew I couldn't ignore it forever. The first time I watched the video I had a deep unsettling feeling in my gut. Women Empowerment is a very important issue and all that the video pointed out to me was the societal double-standard against men in today's seemingly "modern" world. The video talks about matters ranging from the choice of clothing to choice to have sex (I'll come back to this one later) and something about being the snowstorm not the snowflake. The video has got so many things wrong it's not even funny. India has so many problems regarding the society bringing women down. India is the place where a girl being married to a man thrice her age is normal, where a girl has to pay the price when the only sin she has committed is being born a...

Through it all....

I've been through good times And also been through the bad Have laughed so hard that I fell from a chair But also experienced the falling apart Good times bring joys and ecstasies Tough times bring hard luck only Tribulations and sorrow break us apart But the fun times make it worth while Had there not been the times we cried so hard We’d not know the meaning of happiness We’d never find out what care and love is making our life just the ordinary Some situations are not so easy But the solving part makes it just right The day when good overcomes the ugly Life feels just right :)

...I speak my mind =)