Love & Hate

PC: Elitedaily.com

Silence woke her. As she laid on the floor, saliva drooping from her mouth, she realized it had gotten darker. She must have passed out for an hour or so. She sub-consciously touched her forehead. There was no blood this time but she knew it would bruise. The glass had hit her pretty hard, after all. Hits, Bruises and cover-ups were just another day in this household.

As she got bearings of the time and place, she started to look around. Few yards away in the next room, she saw a heap of limbs passed out on the floor. Upon closer inspection, she could smell the concoction of alcohol, vomit and sweat. The view was jarring but she wasn't repulsed. The emotion that overcame her was pity. Pity at the man who was her husband. Pity at the man she once loved.

As she looked back, she didn't know where exactly she she went wrong with her life. Born to a privileged family, she was smart and beautiful. No wonder, she had caught an athlete's eye. He was pretty good-looking and she liked how his eyes twinkled when he talked about Tennis. This was a man who loved his career more than anything in his life. That should've been a red flag, if any. But how could she blame someone for being passionate about their work? Things clicked and they'd gotten married 2 years after they first started seeing each other. They were in love and beyond happy. In Retrospect, she should've seen it coming because when was life ever fair? One night, while returning from a cocktail party together, they'd gotten into a car accident. Having to lose one thing that he loved the most, he was never the same again.
He was never much of a drinker before but that had quickly changed. Whiskey for breakfast, 10 cans of beer before noon was becoming the norm so soon, she had no idea how to put a stop to it. The situation had spun out of control and the day he hit her first time was the day it was all over for her.
After that, it felt weird waking up next to him. She was caged in her own home, prisoner to her own memories.

Standing up, she moved towards the man. She carried him, cleaned him up and put him to bed. She had given up on him years ago so now the task felt menial, almost robotic. She sat in the chair beside the bed looking at his face. She couldn't see how that face had looked charming to her before. She heaved a sigh. And the man suddenly stirred in his bed.

"..a glass of water", he slurred.

She went to the kitchen to get him water. She wanted to cry but the tears wouldn't come. She wanted to slap him awake from the mess he had them in but she seemed to have no energy. As she was filling up the water, her eyes suddenly flew to the knife that sat on the countertop. She had thought about it a million times but could never go through with it. Maybe today was the day, she thought and pocketed it.

She went back to the room and handed him the glass of water with shaky hands. She felt nervous standing so close to him.
He sat up halfway, his sluggish body restraining him, and took the glass. As he took a sip, she knew something was wrong.

"What is wrong with you? I asked for a cold glass of water. Do you not listen to me. Bitch", he bellowed.

And just like that the glass dropped and shattered into a million pieces.

This was it. She took out the knife and right then, she could see the fear in his eyes. She decided she liked having him fear her for a change.

"No, honey....no..please. don't..You don't want to do this...", he whispered.

And just at that instant, the misery that ate her alive was too much to take. She looked into his eyes and with as much force as she could muster, she stabbed herself in the stomach, painting the million fragmented pieces of glass a vivid red. She fell to her knees and knew right then that she would never make it. The pain was intense and beyond anything she had ever imagined. But it would cease eventually.... it had to cease.

Just a couple more moments and she could run away.

Run, run, run and never look back.

Comments

The Knowing

Hey folks,, What's up with you guys? As of me I'm super busy with the assignments and home-works !! No matter how much effort I put....there's always another pile of assignments to complete! (sighs) Anyways.....this time I'm going to post a story I wrote ....Immature you may tell me but I seriously am improving day by day... :) ....Here's goes the story... Aryaa looked stunning in the red gown. Her face was gleaming. He couldn’t help watching her. She was moving so abruptly and graciously towards him that he nearly fainted. She looked ravishing and the pretty girl was now standing by his side. She looked at him with her big sparkly eyes. Her alluring fragrance was lifting him off his feet. She gestured him to tell him something in his ear. He absent-mindedly moved towards her. “Wake Up, Rahul” was what she said. For once he couldn’t make out what she was referring to and the next moment he opened his eyes. Rahul was already so late for college yet his mom insi...

I had to live without my phone for 10 days and it didn't go well.

Few months after I bought a phone, the worst thing that could happen to a person that bought a new phone happened to me. My phone started to dysfunction. My brand new phone, that I was paying way more than I could afford, was having issues. And like any normal person, I too went through the 5 stages of grief. I pretended like I did not see that my apps were crashing and my phone was restarting randomly. I would just put my phone face down when that happened because I did not want to deal with it (kids, don't try this at home). And then I levelled up to the next stage. My phone would restart exactly when I was trying to send an important text, make an important call...or take a picture, or a million, of a beautiful sunset and boy, did that piss me off. I tried to look up solutions online but I couldn't find any that worked for me. Then I started bargaining. Is my phone shutting down and starting up on its own, which takes a total of 20 secs, really that big of a deal? I felt li...

Our story :)

Hey people! So, this story is here because of the special request from a few special people (Apee Regmi and Aayushma Khadka and so on..).I wrote this story some 2 years ago on Valentines day....so it revolves around the same thing. When people read this story they ALWAYS ask me if it happened for real and I say 'no'. It would be fun to have a guy like him with me but NO. This story is NOT... I'll say it one more time... It is NOT based on my experience so you can stop whatever you are planning on questioning me based on the story. Hope I'm clear about this. (sighs) So here goes the story: Young people are very excited as V-day turns up. Some are happy while others are anxious. on 2005 V-day, I also belonged to the anxious group because I was going to ask someone out on that very day, for the very first time in my life. I am Samaira. I normally didn’t believe in love but after meeting him the feeling isn’t peculiar anymore. Aryan made me believe in love, in...

The Chasm

I remember how easy it used to be Closing my eyes shut And, at once, seeing their names On the back of my eyes Painted in bright hues of red Always so close to feel To dream To touch With 'I love you's Gushing out of my lips Faster than I could remember to breathe. Always, All I did was love, love and love again With never present people Setting myself to rot In the chasm they'd build Out of lies and disguise Naïvety or Delusion? I could never figure. Until one day, I realized I was the liar Falling in love with feelings Never people. Setting myself up for loss every time Because despair was a feeling too And I'd rather feel sad than empty; Misery than nothingness.

Poems- I

Picture by my friend, quite a long time ago. I wouldn't call myself a poet. A good one, atleast. But every once in a while someone else takes over. Enjoy! Wrote this one last night because I had an exam. And I felt like doing literally anything other than studying. My favorite line: You took me in your arms And like waves we collided Wrote this one some two months back. Just because. My favorite line: But my heart forgets.

How it all started :)

As I start my very own blog from today.... I'd want to commence by stating how I started writing stuff ...have fun reading, even though, it's my very first piece of write-up here...And I'd love it if you comment on how it went. Thank you :) Writing is not something that I started doing from a very young age and yet I just love how it makes me feel every time I do it. As of now, It has spread inside of me as a poison because even if I try to fall out of this habit now, I just simply can't! It all started out some 5 years ago when my very first piece of writing was published in 'The Himalayan Times', in the 'Schoolpost' section, for the very first time. The encouragement and appreciation I got at that moment made me want to try my hand at this....and now I am what I am today all because of the feeling of being appreciated It was not that I started to write out-of-the-blue. Since a very young age, my father used to take me out to...

Leap: Fall or Flight?

Photo Credit: Wallpaperup.com I have never been an outstanding student in my life. When I was in first grade, I used to come out on 7th place out of 10 people. When I was in 10th grade, I used to come out on 49th place out of 220. When I was in 12th grade, oh wait... let's not talk about 12th grade at all. Anyways, never in my life has any teacher been proud to have me in their class. Okay, except maybe one. What I mean is, I've always been pretty average when it comes to studying. But otherwise, I've always been on the smarter side. And I know for a fact that I'm smarter than most people in my class. Just so you know, I've never been the modest one either. Currently, I'm 1.5 years into my undergrad studies. And let me tell you, business school has been an entirely different experience altogether. In Business school, I have felt a sense of belonging. I know this is what I want to do in Life. Being my own boss and all that. In a sense, It's been a bre...

Through it all....

I've been through good times And also been through the bad Have laughed so hard that I fell from a chair But also experienced the falling apart Good times bring joys and ecstasies Tough times bring hard luck only Tribulations and sorrow break us apart But the fun times make it worth while Had there not been the times we cried so hard We’d not know the meaning of happiness We’d never find out what care and love is making our life just the ordinary Some situations are not so easy But the solving part makes it just right The day when good overcomes the ugly Life feels just right :)

My Solace

My mom had been pestering me to clean my room since ages and there was always something that I used against her to put it off. Yeah, I am no clean freak ...... but my mom is. I am not all up for untidy rooms but no matter how often I put everything in place, somehow a day after everything gets messed up again. So I don't bother much. This morning I finally succumbed to my mom's pleas and decided to do it anyway. I started with my study table as it needed the most immediate attention. And as soon as I got started, I unknowingly rummaged through old notebooks and rough copies. On the last page of EVERY single notebook, there were those scribbles of short poems and extracts of how my day was going on. It got me smiling and a sort of ecstasy spread through my veins. I had always been the kind of person who expressed her feelings through words and .... I haven’t changed one bit. :) The thing with me is - I don't speak much. I was never the person with the largest gro...

Book Review: The Fault In Our Stars

I have never done book reviews in my life except for those compulsory ones that I was made to do in 9th grade by my English teacher. He made us write five book reviews in a month (yes, you heard me right)..So yeah, the quantity ruled over quality and the whole "reviewing books" thing was an epic fail to sum it up. And for a while, I have been running out of things to write about that interests me. So, I had an epiphany this evening about doing reviews. And I said to myself, what better book would there be to start with other than 'The Fault In our Stars' which is probably the most hyped Y/A fiction of the 21st century, yet. In both good and bad ways. I don't remember the first time I heard about the book and that shouldn't surprise any of us as it basically ruled the internet since it came out. So, succumbing to the calls of pop culture, I finally decided to read the book in the fall of 2013. I'm aware that I might be a little late. Here goes noth...

...I speak my mind =)