Rust & stardust

There's not much to say about love
beyond what has already been said
But in the past,
every time we fell apart
I always used to find new ways
To bleed on paper about you.
Yet, this time has been different
Because the words I spit out about you now
don't make any sense
Just like how we fell apart
doesn't
            make
                       any
             sense.

Every time I sat down to write this,

My thoughts always went back to that one time 

When you said I'd never be able to write anything

without you in it, ever again.

I laughed and rolled my eyes at you then

But I knew you were right

Even during the long stretches of radio silence between us, 

my words always seemed to find their way back to you. 

You were sometimes the hero in my stories

Sometimes the villain

And yet, 

you were there

Carefully folded into euphemisms and metaphors
some days of rust and stardust
other days, of lies and disguise
Regardless, you always trickled in.

But how is it that since we fell into this rubble
of what we used to be,
I can't seem to put you into words anymore.
All the words about you,
Seem to have left with you when you left my heart.
And as hard as I try to deny this
I think I'm better off because of it.
My words were getting tired of finding new ways
of describing the same guy,
over and over again.
And even though it hasn't been easy
I must admit,
I was getting tired of trying to love the same guy
Over and over again.

2:55

"Kissed me half a decade later, 

That same perfume,

Those same sad eyes"