Good things, Bad things.

In the fall of 2011, My family took a vacation to South India. Until then, I'd only travelled a few places in Nepal so it was safe to say that I was quite excited. And the fact that I was going away from Kathmandu for a total of 22 days only made it better. Don't get me wrong, I love Kathmandu along with all its quirks but we all need a break sometimes.

My Trip to India involved 2-3 days long train journey at a time, visiting stunning beaches and staying in sea view hotel rooms. Sounds amazing, right? And it was amazing...for 5 minutes. After a while, the euphoria was up in smokes. I had my family right beside me at all times but I missed home. I missed my friends. I don't want to sound like a spoiled brat, but the whole sleeping late/waking up early to visit someplace new got old too soon. Halfway through the trip, I just wanted to go home and fall into the unproductive monotony of a typical 15 year old teenager.

But, you see, this is where things get interesting. When I look back on the trip, usually all that comes to me is the zeal of seeing an ocean for the first time, sipping delicious train 'Chai' , along with all the beautiful memories we made during the trip. I can only remember the unsavory moments if I try hard enough. The first time I realized this, It was so weird to me. Why didn't the flip sides of things come to me first?

As I grew up, it kept on happening. Last year, I made a new friend through an unconventional medium. He was a great friend and we got super close in a short span of time. However, only a couple months later our friendship took a sour turn and we had a falling out. I got over it soon enough but ofcourse tears were involved as is always the case. Again, When I look back all I remember is the excitement and bliss. Even the crying immediately after is a happy memory now. Because in a way, I could feel the pain owing to the fact that something fairly nice had come to an end. I don't know if this makes sense to others but it is how it is.

This.

In Life, people tell you to be awry of doing certain things for the fear of bad consequences. But if you ask me, there are no bad consequences in the long term. When you encounter a setback, it may seem like the worst thing in the history of the world but trust me, when you look back you'll be grateful. Every displeasing situation will shape you for the better if you give it some time. People try to run as far away from issues as possible and I do too most of the times. But there is something about going headfirst into sticky situations and dealing with it , that is so satisfying to me.

As a result, for me there are only unpleasant experiences, no unpleasant memories.

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about love

When I was 10, love was Familiarity. Love was big eyes and sweet smile, coming over to give me his share of chocolates that he got for someone's birthday. Love was getting picked to play with him first. Love was random calls to my house that my mom picked up. Love was waiting for his silly emails over long summer breaks. Love was knowing I was his best friend. When I was 14, love was a Secret. Love was staring at his pretty eyes from far away. Love was the music in my ears whenever I heard him call my name. However, love was also sly. Love was accidentally brushing against his skin while walking beside him. Love was catching him looking at me and at once looking away. Love was the crescendo of heartbeats that came after. Love was... finding out it was love. When I was 17, love was All-knowing. Love was thinking pretty eyes wasn't love at all. Love was realizing I hadn't met love yet but knowing exactly what he looked like. Love will.... definitely be taller than me....

Purple.

it all began one august day as the sky bled into hues of purple, a coy smile from me, some words spoken in the dark from you and with the silent heat of our barely there touches, the yearning turned to longing. and come september, the longing will turn to love. and all it will take is an epiphany, an unintelligible distant symphony, a moment of chance miracle and you will know, that answers were never outside but within. you’d expect it to be earth shattering but it is a mere revelation it’s a switch you flick in your own mind that surrenders your soul. no matter what other say, it was a choice then and it will continue to remain so.

On moving 6629km alone away from home

It was a fresh start, one that I needed desperately. Applications and documentation had taken so much of my time and sucked so much of my energy, I don't think I quite comprehended what the move was going to entail. While I was open to changes, I don't think I was aware of how much transformation across all aspects of life it would take to acclimatise myself to my new reality. I was just happy for a fresh start. Nothing else mattered. But turns out, getting on the plane is the easiest step in all of this. The amount of transformation I've gone through and learning I've done in the past couple months is truly insane, to say the least. Recently, a friend back home asked me how I was doing living alone and I thought about it. Honestly, it hasn't been all good or all bad, but the important thing has been rooting and balancing myself despite it all. Not sure if anything I've written will be groundbreaking or something that hasn't been already said 7 million time...

Rust & stardust

There's not much to say about love beyond what has already been said But in the past, every time we fell apart I always used to find new ways To bleed on paper about you. Yet, this time has been different Because the words I spit out about you now don't make any sense Just like how we fell apart doesn't make any sense. Every time I sat down to write this, My thoughts always went back to that one time When you said I'd never be able to write anything without you in it, ever again. I laughed and rolled my eyes at you then But I knew you were right Even during the long stretches of radio silence between us, my words always seemed to find their way back to you. You were sometimes the hero in my stories Sometimes the villain And yet, you were there Car...

(un)finished business

By Vincent van Gogh - Starry Night Over the Rhone You were a ship passing by my ship during a sunset. Ours was a chance encounter, so it was never about staying close forever Nor was it about helping each other traverse the tides together. We had both set sail to reach far away lands from different ends of the earth With our journeys laid out in front of us. But when we met amidst the vastness of the sea It was difficult not to believe that something about our closeness made sense. There was comfort and ease in existing together, A never before felt sense of synchronicity, That all was unfolding as it should. I was the first to say goodbye though, Not because I didn't want you, But because I wanted you too much and I knew we weren't on the same page. But why is it that even if I was the reason we sail separately today, I find myself thinking about you more frequently than I care to admit. Sometimes, memories of you feel like a fervent fev...

How it all started :)

As I start my very own blog from today.... I'd want to commence by stating how I started writing stuff ...have fun reading, even though, it's my very first piece of write-up here...And I'd love it if you comment on how it went. Thank you :) Writing is not something that I started doing from a very young age and yet I just love how it makes me feel every time I do it. As of now, It has spread inside of me as a poison because even if I try to fall out of this habit now, I just simply can't! It all started out some 5 years ago when my very first piece of writing was published in 'The Himalayan Times', in the 'Schoolpost' section, for the very first time. The encouragement and appreciation I got at that moment made me want to try my hand at this....and now I am what I am today all because of the feeling of being appreciated It was not that I started to write out-of-the-blue. Since a very young age, my father used to take me out to...

...I speak my mind =)